Bobo the Hobo

Bobo the Hobo

Well, many years ago, I was at the State Fair walking down the midway minding my own business when I hear a voice. The voice was something like a loud whisper, if you know what I mean, like someone wanted to tell me a secret but they wanted everybody to hear. "Hey Buddy!" I turned to look in the direction of the voice, there it was again, "Hey, Buddy, YES You!"

What I turned to see was some clown sitting atop of a dunk tank. The sign in the area identified this character as "Bobo the Hobo". Well, he had my attention so I waited briefly to hear what he had to say. It didn't take him long to get to the point, "Hey, buddy", he continues, "Why don't you paint a yella stripe around your belly so is I can tell if youse a walkin' or a rollin'!"

Well, I'm generally not the sensitive type, and I wasn't, at that time, really fat. Yet, there were others there that appeared to rather amused by Bobo's observation. I became rather indignant, I dare he address me in such a manner, I thought. I also remember thinking to myself that there must be a way to even the score. And as luck would have it, there was another gentleman standing nearby with 3 softballs. As the scene unfolded before me, I quickly realized that for the paltry sum of $2 I could throw those 3 softballs at a small target and teach Bobo a lesson.

Now, I don't mean to brag here, but I feel that a little background information is necessary if I am to tell this story correctly. You see, I had previously won very large stuffed animals with my ability to throw various orbs at lead milk bottles, plates and cu-pie dolls. I was banned from playing on one occasion by a carnival barker because of the accuracy of my arm.

How did he know about that day during junior high that the only pants at the store that would fit me were labeled "HUSKY"? He couldn't have known about that, but apparently he did. I believe that this fact alone was the sole cause of my failure to control my throws.

Well, I enriched a Hobo to the tune of $4 that day, a dry hobo, I am sad to say.